Pre-Surgery Rituals: Finding Calm Before the Chaos

I had my first surgery when I was just a year old. Fast forward 23 years, and I’ve been through 43 surgeries in total. With that many under my belt, I’ve learned a thing or two about how to make the process a little less stressful and recovery a little smoother. Whenever someone I love is about to undergo surgery, I feel uniquely qualified to share advice. So for this month’s Museletter, I thought I’d pass along my go-to pre- and post-surgery rituals, just in case they might help you or someone you know, now or in the future. 

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The Week Before

If you know your surgery date ahead of time, I recommend starting preparations about a week before. Think of it as creating a little safety net for yourself so you can focus entirely on healing.

Here’s how I set myself up:

• Make a care team list. Write down a few trusted loved ones and assign each of them a role. For example, you’ll want someone to bring you home after surgery, someone who can help with laundry, someone to take care of your pets, and someone who can make or prep meals for you.
• Plan your food. Have a list of comfort foods you know you’ll eat no matter what: applesauce, soup, fruit, or whatever works best for you. Surgery can throw off your appetite, so it helps to have easy, nourishing options ready.
• Prep your home. If it’s within your budget, schedule a cleaning service for the day before surgery. If not, set aside a little time to tidy up, wash dishes, change your sheets, and put fresh towels in the bathroom. Coming home to a clean, calm space makes a world of difference.
• Avoid anyone who’s sick in the days leading up to your surgery. If you catch something, even just a cold, your medical team may postpone the procedure. And trust me, after going through this 43 times, the last thing you want is to delay and go through all the prep again. Do yourself a favor: protect your health and give your body the best chance to be surgery-ready.
• Start packing your hospital bag. Gather the essentials you’ll want for a few nights in the hospital, things that will make you feel comfortable and cared for. My go-tos are: my favorite blanket, fuzzy socks, a 10-ft rapid charger, a magnetic cord keeper, a phone stand, easy-on/easy-off clothes, a cozy going-home outfit, extra underwear, slip-on shoes, a pillow, and of course, my favorite stuffed animal.

The Night Before

This is usually when the nerves really kick in, which makes self-care extra important. Here’s what helps me focus on comfort and calm:

• Eat your favorite meal. Indulge in whatever makes you happiest, whether it’s your mom’s homemade cooking or that one dish you always order from your favorite restaurant. I promise, you won’t regret treating yourself. For me, it was usually my mom’s fried chicken or chicken piccata.
• Surround yourself with loved ones. Being around people who ground you can make a huge difference. My family has always had a way of easing my nerves and getting me in the right headspace. Invite your people over (as long as they’re healthy!) and spend some time soaking in their support.
• The magic of a peanut butter sandwich. If you’re going under anesthesia, your care team will give you a “no food or drink after this time” rule, called your NPO time. For me, food had to stop at midnight. My mom had a ritual: at 11:30 p.m., she’d wake me up for a peanut butter sandwich and a glass of milk. Her theory was that peanut butter keeps you full longer, so I wouldn’t be as hungry in the morning. I can’t say there’s scientific proof behind it, but after 43 surgeries, I can say it works.
  My cutoff for clear liquids was usually 3 a.m. So after my midnight snack, my mom would wake me again around 2:30 a.m. to drink as much water, Sprite, ginger ale, or (my childhood obsession) dry lavender soda as I could handle. Staying hydrated made it so much easier for the nurses to find a vein for the IV later that day.
• Prioritize sleep. It might sound obvious, but giving your body as much rest as possible the night before surgery can make a big difference. The more well-rested you are going in, the better your body can handle recovery afterward.

The Morning Of

When I was younger, this part was always the hardest. That’s where having a pre-surgery ritual really helps. Clear steps give your brain something to focus on, which in turn calms your body, at least, that’s been true for me.

• Take a shower. Even if you’re a nighttime shower person, take one the morning of. You’ll feel refreshed, and it’s especially important if you won’t be able to shower for a while after surgery.
• Don’t skip skincare. Do. Your. Skincare. In the OR they put all kinds of things on your face, so giving your skin some extra love ahead of time makes a difference.
• Braid your hair (if it’s long). My mom picked up this trick from another mom of a chronically ill kid. Before pre-op, she’d French braid my hair tightly so it wouldn’t get tangled or knotted during or after surgery. Total lifesaver.
• Ground yourself. Meditate, journal, listen to your favorite playlist, whatever helps you feel calm, joyful, and centered before heading in.

At the end of the day, surgery is never easy, but having little rituals can make it feel a little less scary and a lot more manageable. These steps are how I remind myself that even when I can’t control everything, I can create calm, comfort, and care around the parts I do control. If you’re facing surgery, I hope you build your own version of this ritual, something that grounds you, supports you, and reminds you that you’ve got this.

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Cassidy Huff is a nationally recognized disability rights advocate, writer, and content creator. As a physically disabled and hard of hearing woman, she brings a unique perspective to her work, centering equity, accessibility, and authentic representation. Cassidy is a best-selling author, public speaker, and the host of a podcast focused on amplifying disabled voices and lived experiences. Her advocacy spans across digital media, education, and entertainment, and her work has been featured in national campaigns and conversations around disability rights. In addition to writing, Cassidy is the director and producer of two original web series highlighting adaptive adventures and the disability community. She uses her platform to inform, empower, and shift narratives—whether through writing, long-form, short-form content, or public speaking. 

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